Alright everyone, we're going to get a little real this time.
This past week was a bit rough for me. I had my first official meltdown.
Now before I get an overwhelming amount of text messages and phone calls I want to reassure everyone that I am alright and there is no need for you to fuss or freak out.
Most of you know that I have lived in Colorado my entire life and I know nothing more than that. I came out to Utah, because I wanted a change of scenery and to expose myself to a new environment so that I could become a more, well rounded person. And so far it has already taught me a lot. But in being a 21 year resident of Colorado that tends to create some bias', which doesn't help you when you realize that you are 8 hours from a life you have only known for that period of time.
I am proud to say that I have never once gotten homesick. I love traveling and exploring, so it was easy for me to leave home for an extended time. I think this was because in the back of my mind I knew I would eventually get back home.
This scenario is obviously very different. I am not coming home. (For a while at least, don't freak out about that either please. Colorado will always be home to me and I AM COMING BACK. I just don't know my return date).
So this thought eventually began to stew in my brain and of course that never ends well for me. All of this fear and doubt began to overwhelm me and I didn't know how to handle it. I suddenly started to question why I was here and how could I ever leave such a beautiful and comfortable place such as Colorado? Was I crazy to just up and leave all of my friends and family to trek to a somewhat unfamiliar state, where I knew only a handful of people and start a job where I had no experience with the area I chose and had to start completely from scratch??
WHAT WAS I THINKING?!
I then did the only thing I knew would make me feel better. I got down on my knees and I prayed. I prayed for comfort and peace, I prayed for some strength and courage too. (Heaven knows I desperately needed it). I then got up, took a deep breath and told myself these 5 words...
"I can do hard things".
I know through the Lord's love, guidance and strength I can do the things in this life that are incredibly difficult. I know it will be a daily struggle and I'm going to have to work really hard, but I know through Him, I can do it.
Yes it was my choice to come out here, and try something new, and yes I had an inkling of an idea of how hard it was going to be. But now that I have gone through this difficult time, I now know what things I am up against and how I will kick them straight in the face. I refuse to stay down when life pushes me to the ground.
I will get back up. Every. Single. Time.
I control my destiny and this is the direction I have chosen to go. I know it won't get any easier, but I do know that it is going to be worth it. And it will make me a better person for it too. So take that fear and doubt! You can try to take me down, and I emphasize try, but you won't succeed.
Because I can do hard things.
Monday, June 30, 2014
Monday, June 23, 2014
Chapter 2: Back in the Saddle
So blogging is as hard as I thought it would be.
But I'm going to try my hardest to post at least once a week so as to set a realistic goal for myself.
Last week was complete and utter madness with training. So naturally I had a blast.
My first week of training went almost as I expected. Me following my trainer around while they attempt to explain how my job works, whilst simultaneously trying to do theirs. All of the trainers I had were incredibly nice and more importantly patient with me as I attempted to get a grasp on the tasks of a server. I observed the first day and then slowly proceeded to do basic tasks like fill drink orders and buss plates. Day 2 (as posted on Facebook) I had my first drink spill. Now I would love to say that it was just on the floor and no one was a victim to my clumsiness, but alas I cannot. I proceeded to spill on some poor lady's back and the sleeve of the girl next to her. Incredibly embarrassed I proceeded to apologize at least 15 times to them. I am grateful that we warned the table before we brought out the drinks that I was in training and it was my second day. I am also grateful for perceptive managers that swoop in and save the day, and then proceed to reassure you that this part of the job and I was now officially inducted as a server.
The next two days I proceeded to spill again, but thankfully on the floor and tables as opposed to customers backs. By day 4 I was determined to do well and focused on not spilling drink orders and keeping customers happy. And I'm proud to say I managed to do just that. I'll skip over my other shifts as they do no include any sort of exciting spilling stories, but just me doing the best I could.
Today (the 23rd) will be my final shift as a trainee. And I'm proud to say that I am much more confident in myself then I was a week ago. I know I still have a lot to learn, but I know that I can take care of myself and I've got an amazing crew of co-workers and managers behind me in case I need an extra hand. I'm very grateful for all the great help I've had to make it to this point.
It feels good to be back in the saddle again. Even if it's on an unruly mustang named, The Restaurant Biz.
Till next week friends, thanks for reading.
But I'm going to try my hardest to post at least once a week so as to set a realistic goal for myself.
Last week was complete and utter madness with training. So naturally I had a blast.
My first week of training went almost as I expected. Me following my trainer around while they attempt to explain how my job works, whilst simultaneously trying to do theirs. All of the trainers I had were incredibly nice and more importantly patient with me as I attempted to get a grasp on the tasks of a server. I observed the first day and then slowly proceeded to do basic tasks like fill drink orders and buss plates. Day 2 (as posted on Facebook) I had my first drink spill. Now I would love to say that it was just on the floor and no one was a victim to my clumsiness, but alas I cannot. I proceeded to spill on some poor lady's back and the sleeve of the girl next to her. Incredibly embarrassed I proceeded to apologize at least 15 times to them. I am grateful that we warned the table before we brought out the drinks that I was in training and it was my second day. I am also grateful for perceptive managers that swoop in and save the day, and then proceed to reassure you that this part of the job and I was now officially inducted as a server.
The next two days I proceeded to spill again, but thankfully on the floor and tables as opposed to customers backs. By day 4 I was determined to do well and focused on not spilling drink orders and keeping customers happy. And I'm proud to say I managed to do just that. I'll skip over my other shifts as they do no include any sort of exciting spilling stories, but just me doing the best I could.
Today (the 23rd) will be my final shift as a trainee. And I'm proud to say that I am much more confident in myself then I was a week ago. I know I still have a lot to learn, but I know that I can take care of myself and I've got an amazing crew of co-workers and managers behind me in case I need an extra hand. I'm very grateful for all the great help I've had to make it to this point.
It feels good to be back in the saddle again. Even if it's on an unruly mustang named, The Restaurant Biz.
Till next week friends, thanks for reading.
Monday, June 9, 2014
Chapter 1: Arrival to Provo
Hello friends and family!
As promised I have chosen to write a blog about the various adventures I'm expecting to have up here in the great state of Utah. Yeah, I said it!
I know that Utah is no Colorado, but thus far I've had a pretty fantastic experience, so naturally I can only expect more awesome experiences right? And with that statement I obviously have to tell you about my first few experiences here at the Mothership. (I'm trying that out as a nickname for Utah, kind of a silly Mormon joke, we'll see how it goes).
When me and Emily arrived to Provo, it was about 6:00 in the evening. I tried, with no success, to leave early in the morning to get here around 2:00-3:00 in the afternoon. But when you don't pack your stuff into your car the night before, that tends to make for a longer morning than you expect. Lesson learned. Anyway, we arrived to my apartment around that time and I was greeted by a very enthusiastic and adorable group of ladies that I have now found to have the privilege to call roommates. All were so excited to meet me and also more than willing to help me move in. So within the first 10 minutes of being in Provo, I already felt overwhelmed by the love of these awesome girls. After we moved in the first haul and returned to Fernando (my Subaru), I came to discover 3 more had joined our party, but this time it was a group of strapping young men. What luck!
I knew this was the culture of BYU and its students, but again I was blown away by the instant willingness of these wonderful people to help me move my stuff. And 15 minutes later all of my stuff was moved in.
The rest of the week I expected to have plenty of time to unpack and settle, but thanks to the overwhelming excitement and love of my dear friends, my weekend filled up pretty quickly. A lot happened and I don't want to bore my readers, so as the infamous Inigo Montoya said, "Let me sum up". Basically this is what I did: ate my weight in sushi, chilled by the pool, watched Stick it, shopped, played stick ball(?), watched P.S. I Love You, started reading The Fault In Our Stars, met a ton of new people, and finally set up my blog. ;)
So far I am completely overwhelmed by the continuous flow of love and excitement I am receiving up here. The more days that pass, the more I realize how I am truly meant to be here. It is shaping up to be an incredible summer. I'm looking forward to sharing more tales of my life here in Provo! I love all of you and miss you dearly!
P.S. Orientation at Tucanos is tomorrow and I'm super stoked to begin work!
As promised I have chosen to write a blog about the various adventures I'm expecting to have up here in the great state of Utah. Yeah, I said it!
I know that Utah is no Colorado, but thus far I've had a pretty fantastic experience, so naturally I can only expect more awesome experiences right? And with that statement I obviously have to tell you about my first few experiences here at the Mothership. (I'm trying that out as a nickname for Utah, kind of a silly Mormon joke, we'll see how it goes).
When me and Emily arrived to Provo, it was about 6:00 in the evening. I tried, with no success, to leave early in the morning to get here around 2:00-3:00 in the afternoon. But when you don't pack your stuff into your car the night before, that tends to make for a longer morning than you expect. Lesson learned. Anyway, we arrived to my apartment around that time and I was greeted by a very enthusiastic and adorable group of ladies that I have now found to have the privilege to call roommates. All were so excited to meet me and also more than willing to help me move in. So within the first 10 minutes of being in Provo, I already felt overwhelmed by the love of these awesome girls. After we moved in the first haul and returned to Fernando (my Subaru), I came to discover 3 more had joined our party, but this time it was a group of strapping young men. What luck!
I knew this was the culture of BYU and its students, but again I was blown away by the instant willingness of these wonderful people to help me move my stuff. And 15 minutes later all of my stuff was moved in.
The rest of the week I expected to have plenty of time to unpack and settle, but thanks to the overwhelming excitement and love of my dear friends, my weekend filled up pretty quickly. A lot happened and I don't want to bore my readers, so as the infamous Inigo Montoya said, "Let me sum up". Basically this is what I did: ate my weight in sushi, chilled by the pool, watched Stick it, shopped, played stick ball(?), watched P.S. I Love You, started reading The Fault In Our Stars, met a ton of new people, and finally set up my blog. ;)
So far I am completely overwhelmed by the continuous flow of love and excitement I am receiving up here. The more days that pass, the more I realize how I am truly meant to be here. It is shaping up to be an incredible summer. I'm looking forward to sharing more tales of my life here in Provo! I love all of you and miss you dearly!
P.S. Orientation at Tucanos is tomorrow and I'm super stoked to begin work!
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